Monday, 4 May 2015

6 signs you own a dog


If you are a dog owner you obviously know you that yourself and Fido is quite possibly right by your side now - your faithful four-legged friend.  But how else do you (and others) know you own a dog?  The signs are there!

6 signs you own a dog


1.  Your pockets

Every pocket of every coat (and more) will contain a motley collection of dog biscuits and quite probably a piece of string or similar item to be used as as emergency lead.

2.  You never pee alone

What is it with dogs and toilets?  Harry is the worst culprit for this.  When I am home alone I don't always feel the need to shut the toilet door and you'll find his piecing eyes staring intently at you when you have to go.  Maybe he thinks he is missing out on something but I can assure him he's not.  It doesn't make any difference, though, and he'll be there next time unless I shut the door.

3.  No food item left unattended will is safe

Well that will be the case if you have a dog called Saari ... and it's not just human food that she considers fair game:



4.  You spell words

You know, those words that dogs are hard-wired to understand:
Have the dogs had a W.A.L.K. yet?
What time is D.I.N.N.E.R.?
I'll ring the V.E.T. later today

5.  There will be dog hairs everywhere

Now Harry and Saari are not allowed upstairs, although Saari will sneak up for a Sunday morning slobbery kiss if some-one leaves the door open downstairs, but that is rare.  So why are there dogs hairs in every room and even the loft room where the dogs NEVER go?!

6.  You live with various degrees of bad smells:

General dog smells
Considerably worse wet dog smells
I've just rolled in fox/badger/cow poo smells
I've just eaten fox/badger/cow poo and now have vile smelling breath (and it's Sunday so I've snook upstairs and am giving you a slobbery kiss!)
I've just eat fox/badger/cow poo and now I am farting like a .... well, like a dog that has just eaten fox/badger/cow poo.


See, I told you, the signs are there.  Are you a dog owner?  Have you any more signs that indicate the presence of a canine friend in your life?

For more dog and general animal blog posts why not hop over to the Animal Tales blog linky (open from Tues to Friday every week) and have a read of some great animal tales.


20 comments :

  1. Ha ha love this! We're not dog owners but my sister is and I'm sure these are all true for her too! The one about spelling out words works for kids too by the way :)

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    1. Thank you, Michelle and yes we used to spell words to the kids although now they spell too well for that too work and we can't even use the other old trick of speaking words in French as they are bilingual! I suppose that would work for the dogs - promenade, dîner, vétérinaire .... maybe not!

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  2. 7. Perfectly hair free items put in the washing machine come out mysteriously covered in hair.

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  3. Oh yes! I'm familiar with all, except number 2. I absolutely hate number 6! When he smells like poo, Doc stays in the kitchen! As I'm typing this, I can actually smell him ;) #animaltales.

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  4. I have tears of laughter rolling down my cheeks right now! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, and most definitely!

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  5. Hi Rosie, I can relate to each and everyone of those signs. I have a little dog curled up at my feet. The big dogs are not allowed on the furniture, but the furry signs are there in the morning and I swear our house smells of dog (eau de dog), although we can't smell it.

    I invested in a little poach for carrying treats around in as I got fed up of pulling out fluff covered treats that had been through the wash.

    There are words that are best avoided and certain actions too....And I find myself holding conversations with them too, which to an outsider may appear like I've lost my marbles!

    Yep, I'm definitely a dog owner!

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    1. I do think a degree of marble loss is necessary if you are a dog owner!

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  6. Brilliant! I used to own a dog and leaving food alone for a minute was a massive no no.
    The smells were the worst thing, but I'd love to have him back.

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    1. I have lost count of how much Saari has stolen - she is awful!

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  7. So very true! Spelling made me laugh :) We do that all the time. Poo bags going through a wash cycle every time. You also do not need a vacuum cleaner for crumbs at least just ALL the hair!

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    1. ... especially now as Saari is moulting and we are talking a Husky X German Shepherd and she has SO MUCH HAIR!!

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  8. The Mother says - Yep!! That just about covers it. Brilliantly funny.
    Ash the Dog says - But you still love us.........
    #animaltales

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  9. I've got a photo somewhere of Stella trying to pinch the fat balls I'd hung out for the birds! Hard to believe that when I first brought her home she would hardly eat anything and was the only labrador I'd ever met to leave food in her bowl because she was full! She's an utter scavenger these days. And, I swear she thinks there's a secret door in the bathroom and I'm going to leave home if she doesn't barge in with me as well! Wouldn't have 'em any other way though would we? ;)

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  10. Hahha, love this! The treats in all the pockets one is so true. I just laughed the other day when I pulled out my spring coat and realized I had treats in there all dried up from last year!

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    1. I often put them through the washing machine!

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